His response sent chills down my spine: “I thought they were actually a pretty crappy band, and there was no evidence that they could write songs, but when they walked in the room together, there was so much overwhelming charisma, I felt like they changed the molecules in the room. I signed them because they were special people”.
A Senior and the Store Clerk
A little old lady went to the grocery store to buy cat food.
She picked up three cans and took them to the check out counter.
The girl at the cash register said, "I'm sorry, but we cannot
sell you cat food without proof that you have a cat. A lot
of old people buy cat food to eat, and the management
wants proof that you are buying the cat food for your cat."
The little old lady went home,
picked up her cat and brought it back to the store.
They sold her the cat food.
The next day, she tried to buy two cans of dog food.
Again, the cashier said, "I'm sorry, but we cannot
sell you dog food without proof that you have a dog.
A lot of old people buy dog food to eat, but the
management wants proof that you are buying
the dog food for your dog."
So she went home and brought in her dog.She then was able to buy the dog food.
The next day she brought in a box with a hole in the lid.
The little old lady asked the cashier to stick her
finger in the hole. The cashier said, "No, you
might have a snake in there."
The little old lady assured her that there wasnothing in the box that would harm her.
So the cashier put her finger into the boxand quickly pulled it out.
She said to the little old lady, "That smells like shit."
The little old lady said,"It is. I want to buy a roll of toilet paper."
Don't mess with old people !
Subject: Fwd: Texting for Seniors--Enjoy!
Young people have theirs.
Now Seniors have their own texting codes:
* ATD - At the Doctor's
* BFF - Best Friends Funeral
* BTW - Bring the Wheelchair
* BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth
* CBM - Covered by Medicare
* CUATSC - See You at the Senior Center
* DWI - Driving While Incontinent
* FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
* GGPBL - Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
* GHA - Got Heartburn Again
* HGBM - Had Good Bowel Movement
* LMDO - Laughing My Dentures Out
* LOL - Living on Lipitor
* OMSG - Oh My! Sorry, Gas
* TOT - Texting on Toilet
* WAITT - Who Am I Talking To?
Hope these help.
GGLKI (Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking in!)
I love great art, no matter the medium.
I love great art, no matter the medium.
I love great art, no matter the medium.
I love great art, no matter the medium.